Will candlelit dinners, walks on the beach and other intimate pleasures have become “old hat”? In a time when it is becoming less and less fashionable, romanticism struggles to find its place in the life of a couple. But what about extramarital affairs? Are unfaithful partners more sentimental with their lover than with their partner? This is what Gleeden, the European leader in extramarital dating with more than 3 million members, is trying to understand. Find out the responses of more than 7 000 members*.
According to a recent OnePoll survey, involving 2 000 people, romanticism does not seem very fashionable! In fact, 75% of the people questioned said they were not romantic with their partner. A quarter of them said they had forgotten the anniversary of their first date while 8% admit to having completely forgotten their other half’s birthday. Perhaps unfaithful couples are ultimately the most romantic?
The lover receives more signs of affection…
Love letters, bouquets of flowers and impromptu meals in a restaurant: Gleeden questioned their unfaithful members to know who’s the recipient of more signs of their affection. The fair sex seems to indulge their lover more. 61% of women in the survey said they were actually more attentive to their lover than to their partner. The same goes for men, 67% of whom are more attentive to their lover in everyday life.
68% actually confess to having a romantic dinner more often with their mistress than with their partner, just like the majority of women (61%), who had rather enjoy a candlelit dinner with their lover. As for “sexting” and other erotic messages, 79% of men and 74% of women sent them more often to their lover. Only telephone calls are more often for the official partner.
…But less “I love you”
Tender exchanges are, on the other hand, much more important in the life of the official couple. Men are more selective, as 86% say “I love you” more often to their wife than to their mistress, while 71% give them a pet name. Women also express endearments more often to their partner. But more than a quarter of women (26%) says “I love you” more often to their lover!
More romantic when unfaithful
Can an extramarital relationship influence romantic behavior? The answer is yes! 71% of women and 59% of men feel more romantic, with both their partner and their lover, when they are in an extramarital relationship. So yes, the first stirrings at the start of a relationship can revive forgotten emotions and nurture the desire to pay more attention to yourself and to the image you convey. A state of mind that affects both the relationship in question as well as the conventional couple relationship. Could this be the ultimate secret of how couple relationships can survive?
Solène Paillet, the head of Gleeden communications, comments about this survey:
“Today, romanticism has a rather old-fashioned image. Contemporary dating is dominated by automation and speed is the priority. This is evident with all existing dating apps. Everything has to move quickly, with an emphasis on quantity rather than quality, which leaves little room for romanticism. Yet to start a real relationship, men and women both need romanticism. It requires a period of seduction and the establishment of a bond, so trust can grow. This is what we endeavour to preserve on Gleeden, emphasizing the process of discovering another human being; even on the internet, romanticism should not be forgotten.“
*Gleeden.com online survey conducted with 3 561 men and 3 448 women who maintain an extramarital relationship.